


I am never not thinking of you

by madisonrene



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Sleepless in Seattle AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-05 06:28:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4169418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madisonrene/pseuds/madisonrene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason's wife died and he's trying to take care of their son on his own. His son calls a radio station on Christmas and he tells the host his Christmas wish is to have a new wife or husband for his dad. Jordie hears the show and decides to write to Jason. </p><p>Based on the movie Sleepless in Seattle with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan</p>
            </blockquote>





	I am never not thinking of you

**Author's Note:**

> There aren't enough Jordie/Jason fics so I took it upon myself to write this one. (Jamie/Tyler is more of background pairing) Sleepless in Seattle is one of my favorite rom coms and I was crying to it one night when I had this idea. The real struggle was taking a movie from the early nineties and updating it for a modern setting (seriously you should see what the internet looks like in the movie)
> 
> You can definitely read this if you haven't seen the movie - I only borrowed the basic premise.
> 
> Don't read too much into anyone's ages. It obviously takes place in a different year/universe than we are currently in because Jason has a ten year old son.
> 
> Title from the Virginia Woolf quote "In case you ever foolishly forget; I am never not thinking of you."
> 
> By far the best part of writing this fic was having "Jamie is Rosie O'Donnell" in my notes. Enjoy!

It had all happened so fast. Well, not really, but for some reason that’s what Jason keeps saying. What he keeps telling everyone. And how can anyone correct him? His wife just died and he feels more lost than he has ever felt in his entire life. And Henry. Henry is only ten and he doesn’t have a mom. Jason is terrified of raising him alone, but what choice does he have?

Kevin walks up to him and starts talking to him. Jason is still deep in thought and doesn’t hear a word of it. “Sorry, Kevin. What’s up?”

Kevin looks at him sympathetically and pats his arm. “I said Mom is looking for you. She keeps talking about casseroles and shit. Apparently she called the whole god damn neighborhood and had them make food for you. Guess you’re eating casseroles for the next month.” He smiles tentatively at Jason.

Jason can tell that Kevin is trying to lighten the mood, to make him feel better. Jason just doesn’t know if that’s possible anymore.

The next week at work, Jim from accounting comes up to Jason’s desk. Jason knows exactly what this conversation is going to be before it starts, but he doesn’t stop it. Jim hands him a card and says, “Here, this is my shrink. He’s pretty great and I’m sure he’d be happy to take you on.”

Jason sighs and walks to his briefcase. He pulls out a whole stack of business cards and starts going through them one by one, “Loss of Spouse Support Group. Chicago Cancer Family Network. Parents without Partners. "Hug Yourself","Hug a Friend", "Hug a Shrink” He stops and looks up, then continues talking, using air quotes as he says, “Work hard, that'll save you. Only work will see you through this.”

Jim looks like someone slapped his face. Jason sighs again and holds up his hands, “Don’t mind me; I’m just the guy that lost his wife.” Jim looks sympathetic. Jason continues, “Honestly, I think what we really need is…change.”

Jim jumps at the chance for normal conversation. “That’s a great idea, Jason. You should take some time off. Take Henry on vacation. Relax.”

Jason looks back at him, “No, I think we need permanent change. Moving. Someplace where I don’t see Amy everywhere I go. I was thinking Seattle.”

A few weeks later, Jason and Henry are all packed up and ready to leave. Kevin and his wife, Kim are seeing them off. Kim looks at Jason, “In a few months you’ll start dating again.”

Jason laughs, “Yeah, and maybe I’ll grow a new heart too.” Kim looks hurt. “Sorry Kim. It’s just…it just doesn’t happen twice.”

////

“Brenden, we’re going to be late!” Jordie yells up the stairs. He’s trying to gather all of the Christmas presents up in his arms because there is no way he is making more than one trip to the car. Brenden comes up behind him and takes a few packages.

“Thanks,” Jordie smiles at him as they head out to their cars.

“Are you sure we can’t just ride together?” Brenden asks, pouting a little.

“You know I have to leave early. We don’t get that many days off for the holidays.”

“I know. I just wish you could.”

They get all the packages loaded and Brenden looks at Jordie. “Can we go over it one more time? I’m sure I’m going to forget somebody and look like an idiot.”

Jordie sighs, but nods. “Okay so my sister is…”

“Jenny. And she’s with…Dave?”

“Yes. The male nurse. Don’t make of fun of him for that by the way; he could kick your ass. I saw him take Jamie down at Thanksgiving and it scared the shit out of me.”

“Okay, noted. And your aunt is Lisa and she’s married to Hank, who is the one who went to prison, right?”

“Yes, but again don’t mention that. Actually just don’t mention the prison at all. Or the IRS. Stick to the light topics babe and you’ll be fine.”

Brenden frowns at the pet name. Jordie will never understand why he doesn’t being called ‘babe’. Jordie looks up and Brenden is staring at him intently.

“What’s wrong?” Jordie asks.

“Am I what they had in mind?”

Jordie looks confused, “What?”

Brenden sighs, “Am I what your family had in mind? Like, am I what they want for you?”

Jordie grabs his hand. “They’re gonna love you.” He kisses Brenden, “But not if we’re late. Holy shit we gotta go!”

They both get into their respective cars and drive to Jamie’s house. They grab all of their presents and hurry to the door. Jamie answers when they knock, “Really you guys? You live ten minutes away. How could you be late?”

Tyler shows up behind him, “They were probably fucking.”

Brenden turns bright red and starts protesting. Jordie holds up his hand, “Save it babe, you’ll never convince them otherwise.”

Brenden sighs and Jordie isn’t sure if it’s because he called him ‘babe’ again or because Tyler made a sex joke. Probably both. They get inside and get caught up in the whirlwind of saying hi to the million family members that somehow show up to every holiday. By the time they sit down to dinner, Brenden has met everyone at least twice.

Jordie stands up as everyone takes their seats. His mom looks at him and then down the table and says, “Everyone, Jordie has an announcement!”

Jordie catches a look that passes between Jamie and Tyler, but he doesn’t know what it means. He ignores them and clears his throat. He looks down at Brenden before he says, “Brenden and I are engaged!”

His mom and aunt start hugging, talking about how happy they are. Jamie looks at Jordie with raised eyebrows and a smirk on his face, but says nothing. Jordie gets wrapped up into a conversation with his dad about wedding plans.

“I really think you should have a June wedding Jordie. The Island is so nice in June.”

“Dad, I never said we were getting married on the Island.”

His dad scoffs, “Well where else are you going to get married? Dallas? There’s no way I’m paying for a wedding in Dallas.”

“Dad, Brenden and I haven’t even talked about this yet.”

“You should have salmon at the wedding. It’s not a real wedding unless there’s salmon.”

“Dad.”

“And you know Gary who lives down the street? His daughter is a florist. She could do the arrangements.”

“DAD!”

His dad stops talking and looks at him. Jordie’s face gets red.

“Sorry, but I was just trying to figure out if you were going to plan the whole wedding right now. Otherwise, I thought maybe we could have Christmas dinner?”

His dad laughs and starts eating. Jordie realizes later that he made a huge mistake announcing the engagement at such a big family gathering because he doesn’t get a chance to catch his breath for two whole hours. He finally manages to escape from his cousins who keep talking to him about bouquets like he even knows anything about flowers. He heads out to the patio where Jamie and Tyler are relaxing and drinking beer.

As he walks up, Tyler tosses Jordie a beer. He catches it before he plops down on a lawn chair.

“Who knew a wedding would be such a big deal?” He laughs and turns to Jamie. “Courtney and Ellen were just talking to me for twenty minutes about bouquets. I don’t know shit about flowers dude.”

Tyler and Jamie laugh at him. Tyler puts his arm on Jordie’s shoulder and says, “Just tell them you’ve decided to have the wedding at the rink. You’re going to skate down the aisle holding a bouquet of hockey sticks. Your vows will be chirps and trash talk and when you guys skate away we’ll all throw hats in the air instead of rice.” He considers this for a minute and turns to Jamie, “You know we could do that for our wedding.”

Jamie makes a disgusted face, “There’s no way in hell I’m doing that. Also, who says I want to marry you?”

Tyler sticks his tongue out at him before turning back to Jordie. “Where’s Brenden?”

“He had to leave to go to his parents’ house early. Some thing they do for just their kids on Christmas Eve.” Jordie shrugs and takes another sip of beer.

Jamie and Tyler share another look before Jamie opens his mouth to talk. Jordie cuts him off, “Why do you guys keep doing that? Is there something you’re not telling me?”

Jamie sighs and says, “Are you really marrying Brenden?”

Jordie looks at him like he’s insane, “Of course I am! We’ve been together for two years. He has a _real job_ Jamie. Actually, I think he’s perfect.”

Tyler makes a face and rolls his eyes, “Brenden may be a lot of things, but he is not perfect.”

Jordie is taken aback. He thought that Jamie, Tyler, and Brenden had gotten along well. They had always included him in their game and TV nights without any complaint. He really didn’t see this coming.

“Where’s this coming from? You guys like him.”

Jamie shushes Tyler and looks at Jordie, “Look, Jordie. If you think he’s the one for you, then marry him. But I get the feeling he’s not your soulmate.”

Jordie scoffs. “There isn’t such a thing you guys.”

Tyler looks at Jordie like he’s offended, “How dare you? Have my numerous rom-com movie marathons taught you nothing? Soulmates are so fuckin' real dude. Look at me and Jamie.”

Jordie makes a gagging noise, but doesn’t miss the incredibly fond look Jamie gives Tyler. He can’t help but think that he’s never looked at anyone like that, not even Brenden.

“But seriously Jordie. Think about the first time you guys met. Do you remember?”

“Of course I do.”

“And did you have that moment? You know when you touch for the first time and you just…know? It’s like magic.”

Jordie looks at his hands before he looks at Tyler. “No.”

Tyler sucks in a breath.

Jamie interrupts, “That doesn’t mean anything. Tyler’s a little dramatic.”

“I am NOT dramatic. You dropped your coffee the first time you saw me. When I shook your hand it was all sweaty, but I still thought you were adorable. You mumbled out your name and I knew I was gonna marry you. I didn’t even know if you were into guys, but I didn’t care. I was going to make you mine no matter what.”

Jamie is extremely red as he turns back to Jordie, “Not everyone is as insane as Tyler and I are. I’m sure you and Brenden will be fine.”

Jordie looks at his watch and realizes it’s time for him to go. He says goodbye to Jamie and Tyler before heading back into the masses. He gets out relatively unscathed and makes it to his car. As he gets on the highway towards Austin, he realizes he left his iPod at home. He flips on the radio and tries to find a station that isn’t playing Christmas music.

He stops on a talk show station. It’s one of those weird advice shows, but at least it will entertain him.

_Good Evening, this is Dr. Marcia Fieldstone with the show “You and Your Emotions”. Tonight our topic is “What is your Christmas wish”_

_We have a caller on the line. What is your name sweetheart?_

_“My name is Henry ____"_

_No last names Henry. Where are you calling from?_

_“Seattle.”_

_And what’s your Christmas wish?_

_“It’s not for me. It’s for my dad. He needs a new wife. Or husband.”_

_You don’t like the one he has?_

_“He doesn’t have one.”_

_Where’s your mom?_

_“She died.”_

“Jesus,” Jordie says out loud. How sad does a kid have to be to call into a radio station asking for a new parent?

_“I’ve been sad, but my dad’s been worse.”_

_Have you tried talking to him about it?_

_“No, it just makes him sadder.”_

_Henry is your dad home?_

_“Yeah.”_

_Is he busy?_

_“No he’s out on the deck.”_

_Do you want to bring him to the phone?_

_“No! He’ll kill me.”_

“Hang up Henry!” Jordie says out loud. Wow, he’s way too invested in this show.

_He won’t be angry when he hears how concerned you are about him._

“Want to bet?” Jordie scoffs.

_If he yells you’ll lose a fan._

“Dad, there’s someone on the phone for you.”

Jason is confused, but he comes inside. He doesn’t remember hearing the phone ring.

_“His name is Jason.”_

Jason picks up the phone.

_“Hello?”_

_Jason, this is Dr. Fieldstone on Network America._

_“What are you selling tonight? Micro-hibachis or knives?”_

_Neither. I’m here to help. Your son asked me for advice. He wants to find you a new wife._

_“Or husband!”_

_Right. A new husband or wife._

_“Who is this?”_

_It’s Dr. Marcia Fieldstone of Network America. You’re on the air._

Jason looks at Henry from across the room. He’s trying to hide behind the kitchen island, but the phone cord doesn’t reach that far. “You called a radio station?”

_Jason, are you there?_

_“Yes.”_

_You mourn your wife’s death. Your son is worried about you._

Jason looks back at Henry. “Get out here. I’m not going through this alone.” Henry hangs up the kitchen line and comes to sit with Jason. He climbs into his lap and puts his head near the phone so he can hear.

_It’s hard for him to talk to you about this. If we talk about it, maybe Henry will feel better._

“Talk to her dad. She’s a doctor.”

Jason rolls his eyes, “Her first name could be doctor.”

Henry gives him a look, “Please, Dad?”

_Jason, it’s his Christmas wish._

_“Okay.”_

_Good. I know this is difficult. When did your wife die?_

_“About a year and a half ago.”_

_Have you had any relationships since then?_

_“No.”_

_Why not?_

_“Marcia…or Dr. Fieldstone?”_

_“Call me Dr. Marcia.”_

_“I don’t mean to be rude…”_

_I don’t want to pry, Jason._

“Sure you do.” Jordie says out loud, at the same time the guy on the radio – Jason – says the same thing. It makes Jordie smile.

_“Sure you do.”_

_Go on, Jason. I’m listening._

_“We had a pretty tough time at first. But we’re dealing with it. Henry and I will get along fine, as soon as I break his radio.”_

Jordie finds himself laughing out loud again. He doesn’t remember the last time he laughed this much at someone he doesn’t know.

_I’m sure you’re a wonderful father. You can tell a lot from a voice_

_“Yes you can.”_

Jordie can tell the guy is getting irritated with the doctor, but he’s being funny about it, so Jordie keeps listening.

_Henry feels that you’re under a cloud. Are you sleeping at night?_

_“He doesn’t sleep at all.”_

Jason looks down at Henry. “How do you know that?”

“I live here, Dad.”

_“Look, it’s Christmas. My wife, Amy…she really did it. She really went all out. Made everything beautiful.”_

_It’s tough this time of year._

_We’ll resume after these messages. Jason and Henry don’t go away. I’m talking to Sleepless in Seattle. We’ll be right back with listener response._

Jason looks at Henry, “What’s that?”

“People call in and dump on you.”

“This is really fun. And helpful.”

_If there was one question I was allowed to ask…_

_“Oh go ahead, Marcia. We’re all friends here.”_

This guy is giving Jordie a run for his money in the sarcasm department. Jordie is actually surprised that she hasn’t kicked him off the show yet.

_People who truly loved once are far more likely to love again. Jason, could you love anybody as much as you loved your wife?_

_“Well that’s hard to imagine.”_

_What are you going to do?_

_“I’m going to get out of bed every morning, breathe in and out all day long. Then after a while, I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed in the morning and breathe in and out. And then after a while I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.”_

Jordie gets tears in his eyes as this guy pours his heart out on the radio. He finds himself clinging to the guy’s every word. He even takes a detour to make the trip take longer.

_Jason, tell me what was so special about your wife._

_“Well, how long is your program?”_

Jordie is full on crying now. He has to pull the car over.

_“It was a million tiny little things. When you add them all up, it just meant that we were supposed to be together. And I knew it. I knew it the first time I touched her. It was like coming home, only to no home I’d ever known. I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew it. It was like ...”_

Jordie knows this one. “Magic.” He says out loud. He ends up saying at the same time as Jason again.

_“Magic.”_

_Well, folks, it’s time to wrap it up. I’m Dr. Marcia Fieldstone in Chicago and to all my listeners, a magical and merry Christmas. And to you, Sleepless in Seattle we hope you’ll call again soon and let us know how it’s going._

_“Oh, you can count on it.”_

Jason looks down and notices that Henry is asleep. He absentmindedly runs his fingers through his son’s hair as he thinks about the radio show. Staring at the Christmas tree, he realizes how much he really misses Amy. Before he starts crying, Jason scoops Henry up and carries him to his bed.

////

Jordie tries to pull himself together. He pulls into a gas station and washes his face. As he looks in the mirror, he wonders if he’s making a mistake marrying Brenden. He shakes his head and heads back to his truck.

As Jordie walks into the locker room later that week, he’s tackled into a bear hug by Tyler. Jamie looks on, amused. They all get dressed quickly and have a pretty decent practice. They make lunch plans as they head to the showers, and soon Jordie is in Jamie’s truck and they’re heading to their favorite restaurant.

Tyler starts the conversation as soon as they sit down to eat. “So, Jordie. I wanted to apologize.”

Jordie looks up, “For what?”

“For the other night. Christmas. I guess I kind of acted like a jerk.”

Jordie feels Jamie kick Tyler under the table. “Okay, I did act like a jerk.”

“I don’t think you did.”

“Well, Jamie thinks I did. He says that I shouldn’t talk to you about your relationship because ‘it’s not my place and you don’t know anything about their relationship Tyler’.”

Jordie looks at Jamie, who starts talking, “I just thought you looked pretty beat up about it, Darth. I don’t want you to think we’re trying to tell you what to do with your life.”

Instead of responding to anything they said Jordie changes the subject, “So I was listening to the radio the other night.”

“Why?” Tyler interrupts him.

“Because I left my iPod at home, you dick. Don’t interrupt me. Anyway, this was Christmas. I was listening to the radio on the way to Brenden’s parent’s house. The only thing on that wasn’t Christmas music was this self-help talk show thing.”

“So basically you got life advice while driving?”

“Tyler, I swear to god if you don’t stop interrupting me…” Tyler holds up his hands in surrender.

“So, yeah I’m listening to this talk show and this kid calls in. He’s telling the shrink about how his dad is all sad because his mom died. He tells her that his Christmas wish is to find a new husband or wife for his dad.”

“Wow, he said husband?” It’s Jamie who interrupts this time.

Jordie looks at him, exasperated, but he nods.

“Hmm. Progressive,” Tyler looks thoughtful.

“Anyway,” Jordie looks at them pointedly. “The shrink gets the dad to talk about his ex and he’s going on about how great she was and how they were made for each other and all of the sudden I’m crying. Like, I had been tearing up a bit when he talked about his wife dying, but by the end of the broadcast I had to pull over to the side of the road because I was bawling so hard.”

He looks up to catch Tyler and Jamie exchanging a look, “What? I’ve seen you both cry before. Tyler, you cried last night at _When Harry Met Sally_!”

“We aren’t making fun of you for crying, first of all. Second of all, I can’t believe you don’t cry at that movie, come on.”

“Tyler, the guy spends the whole movie talking about how a man and a woman can’t be friends because sex will always get in the way. Meg Ryan tries to prove him wrong the whole time and then they have sex and he’s right! Well, for like three months and then they end up together. Anyway, it’s super sexist and it should have ended with them being friends.”

Jamie looks at Jordie, amused, “Been holding that in?”

Jordie blushes.

“So why were you telling us this Jordie? Are we supposed to be congratulating you on getting in touch with your sensitive side?” Jamie is smirking.

“Well, I was reading an article online today about it and apparently the station has gotten thousands of emails and phone calls asking for this guy’s number.”

“This guy could be a crackhead. He could be a junkie or a murderer and people are just asking for his number?”

“He seemed like a really sweet guy, Jamie.”

“Okay, Jor but he could be a lunatic. Or worse he could be like Tyler.” Jordie looks at Tyler, who is currently shoving fries in his mouth.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Tyler manages to look offended.

“Nothing, babe. Just kidding.”

“I’m serious, Jamie. He just seemed like a lonely guy.”

Jamie looks back at Jordie and his tone goes soft, “Why do you care so much about this, Jordie? You don’t even know the guy. Do you have a thing for him?”

Jordie looks confused, “No. What? I’m madly in love with Brenden. Come on. I’m getting married!” He points at the ring on his finger.

Jamie doesn’t look convinced, but he drops it. They spend the rest of the meal talking hockey.

Later that week, on New Year’s, Jordie and Brenden go to a party that the Star’s organization is throwing for the players. They get pretty drunk and start dancing.

As they move around the dance floor, Brenden says something to Jordie.

“What did you say? I didn’t catch that.”

Brenden laughs and Jordie remembers why he fell in love with him.

“I said, ‘I have an idea’.”

“Hmm what’s your great idea?”

“You guys play in New York on the 13th of February right?”

“I think so?”

“Well, you are. I checked. Anyway, I was thinking we could stay behind in New York. Spend Valentine’s weekend there.”

Jordie lights up at the idea, “Yes. Yeah that sounds amazing. Can we ice skate in Central Park?”

“You play hockey for a living!”

“It’s not the same as ice skating with my fiancé.”

“Okay. We’ll ice skate. I was also thinking we could register,” Brenden’s grin gets wider as he says this.

“Register?”

“You know, for our wedding?”

Jordie feels really dumb. “Of course. Yeah, let’s do that.” He smiles at Brenden. Tyler and Jamie dance by them, all flailing limbs and laughter.

Brenden nudges Jordie, “At least we don’t dance like that, right?”

Jordie smiles and nods, but he doesn’t really agree with him. Jamie and Tyler look like they’re having a blast. They don’t seem to care about what anyone else is doing. Their eyes are locked on each other and they look happy. So happy.

Jordie’s thoughts are interrupted by the countdown “10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1! Happy new year!” Brenden grabs Jordie around the waist and pulls him into kiss. It’s short, but it’s sweet. Brenden doesn’t really like public displays of affection. Jordie can’t help but search the room for Jamie and Tyler. He sees them, still wrapped up in each other, kissing. They stay like that for a while, and Jordie has to look away eventually.

////

The day after New Year’s is the worst. Or it has been since Amy died. She used to get up and cook pancakes for Henry and Jason: Little Mickey Mouse ones for Henry and huge plate-sized ones for Jason. Jason had tried to make them last year, but he had ended up crying on the kitchen floor instead. He had been able to clean himself up before Henry came downstairs, but that had ended the tradition.

This year he decides to take Henry out for breakfast before he has to go to work. He can tell Henry is disappointed that he didn’t make pancakes at home, but he just can’t handle it. He gets Henry back in time to meet the babysitter and is off to work.

Work is insane. Mrs. Miller, the client whose house Jason is designing, keeps changing everything. Every time Jason goes to her new house, she has five new ideas about the fireplace or the deck. It’s exhausting. He manages to change her mind about most of the changes she had for the day, and he feels pretty successful. She stops to talk to him before she leaves.

“I heard you on the radio the other day, Jason.”

Oh god no. Why god? Please do not let Mrs. Miller hit on him. Please.

“I called my mom and said ‘Mom turn on the radio, that’s my architect’.”

Jason just nods. The two guys behind him are laughing at him and he’s going to slap them when Mrs. Miller leaves.

“I just want you to know that I’m here for you if you need me.”

Jason rubs the back of his neck and smiles, “Thanks Mrs. Miller. I’ll keep that in mind.” She leaves and Jason turns around to smack his co-workers, but they’re both doubled over laughing at him.

“It’s fine Spezz, I can wait. Also Cody, fuck you, when was the last time you had a date?” Cody goes silent at that and Spezza is just laughing harder. Jason throws his hands up in frustration.

When he gets home, Jason sees the mailman at the door, handing Henry an insane amount of letters. Jason helps grab some of them and takes them inside.

“Henry, why are all of these letters addressed to ‘Sleepless in Seattle’?”

“Because these people heard you on the radio and they wanna talk to you.” Henry says this like it’s obvious and Jason should have known it already.

“I understand that part, bud. The part I don’t understand is how all of these people got our address.”

“I gave it to the radio people when they called.”

“Of course you did. Why wouldn’t you?”

////

Jordie is officially losing it. It’s two in the morning and he’s wide awake. Wide awake and thinking about the guy from the radio. He’s been thinking about him a lot lately. It’s not intentional, but whenever Jordie has free time, he finds his mind going back to the radio show. He really isn’t trying to invest so much time in a complete stranger, but he can’t help it.

Realizing he isn’t going to be getting any sleep soon, Jordie heads down to the kitchen to have a snack. On the corner of the counter, he sees the small radio that Brenden had brought with him one night during a big storm. Unable to control himself, he turns it on. Keeping it at a low volume, he flips through channels until he finds what he’s looking for.

Dr. Marcia’s program is on again and it’s playing an ad. It features past stories that have been on the show. Jordie is only sort of listening, his concentration focused on the apple he is peeling. He almost drops the knife when he hears “Who could forget Sleepless in Seattle?” He manages to continue peeling the apples without cutting any of his fingers off. The radio is still playing clips from Jason’s story and Jordie is trying to get ahold of himself.

He thinks he’s succeeded until he hears, “I’m going to get out of bed every morning, breathe in and out all day long. Then after a while, I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed in the morning and breathe in and out. And then after a while I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.”

By the end of the clip, Jordie is crying. He doesn’t know when he became such a crier, but Jordie thinks it’s getting out of hand. He wipes his eyes and tries to focus on eating his apple. He ends up tossing it after a few bites and heads to the bathroom to clean himself up.

The next day at the rink, Jordie corners Jamie after practice. “I think I’m going insane, Jamie.”

“You’ve been there a long time, Darth.”

“I’m serious, Jamie”

Jamie actually makes eye contact with Jordie at this point and seems to realize that he’s not joking. His face gets serious and he puts his arm on Jordie’s shoulder. “What’s going on? Are you and Brenden having problems?”

“…Not really? It really doesn’t have to do with him. Well, I guess it might? I don’t know.”

Jamie looks concerned now. “Okay bud, let’s go to lunch and talk about this.”

Jordie nods. Tyler joins them after a few minutes and Jordie is glad for the extra ears. He needs someone to help him figure out what’s going on in his stupid brain.

They get to a diner that they go to sometimes and ask for a table in the back. Jordie really doesn’t want the whole world listening to him telling his friends that he’s obsessed with a guy from the radio. They settle in and order their drinks and food. Once the waitress walks away, Jamie looks at Jordie expectantly.

Jordie sighs before he starts talking, “I think I’m going insane.”

“Yeah Jordie, you told me that much already. Can you please tell me why before I start researching shrinks in the area?”

“Remember that guy from the radio?”

“…Yes.”

“I can’t stop thinking about him.”

Tyler looks amused, “The guy from the radio that you’ve never seen in your entire life.”

Jordie glares at him, “Yes asshole, that guy from the radio. Anyway, my stupid brain has literally been consumed by thoughts of him.”

Jamie looks sympathetic, “Are you and Brenden having problems?”

Jordie looks up quickly, “No. It’s nothing like that. We’re fine. I think. It’s just…we aren’t perfect.”

Tyler scrunches up his eyebrows, “No one is perfect, Jordie.”

Jordie scoffs and then gestures between Jamie and Tyler, “You guys are pretty fuckin’ close.”

Jamie leans in, his face serious, “Jordie, yesterday we argued about how to fold socks. For twenty minutes."

Tyler nods solemnly and says, “We also had to work really hard to get here. Remember how we were when we first started dating? We were a fucking mess and everyone on the team was pissed at us because it was affecting our games. It’s not easy.”

“You know, this isn’t necessarily about me doubting mine and Brenden’s relationship. It’s more about this guy from the radio who has made me cry twice just by being so fucking deep.”

“Twice?”

“They replayed his story the other night and I couldn’t sleep.”

Jamie puts his hand on Jordie’s and says, “Jordie, I don’t think this makes you crazy. I think it means you have a lot to think about. You have to think about this and figure out why you’re focusing on this guy you don’t even know instead of your fiancé.”

Jordie nods at that and is about to say something when their food arrives. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was until his food got there. The conversation seemed over and they started talking about other things.

When they get back to Jamie’s truck, Jordie can tell that they want to continue the conversation. Jamie starts it off. “Do you think you’re in love with this guy?”

“Jamie, I can’t be in love with someone I’ve never met.”

“Okay, are you in love with the idea of him?”

“Maybe. It’s probably just part of having cold feet Jamie. I’m getting married this year and it’s freaking me out. That’s normal though, right? Like, if you two were getting married you’d be shitting bricks too.”

Jamie looks over at Tyler for a moment and smiles. He looks back at Jordie and says, “I don’t think so Jor. I think I’d be excited about it. Like, ready for it to happen. Not saying that it means there’s something wrong with you and Brenden, but maybe you should think about why you’re so worried about getting married.”

“You love telling me to think about things, don’t you?”

“You’d be amazed at what you’ll figure out when you just think about things for a minute Jordie. I know it’s not your favorite thing to do, but that’s how you figure shit out.”

“Yeah, and I have a lot of shit to figure out.”

////

“How the fuck do you date?” Jason is sitting down with Spezza after work, drinking beer and de-stressing. Henry is with his grandparents for the week and even though Jason hates to admit it, it’s kind of nice to have some free time. Jason never gets to spend time with Spezza outside of work. He’s one of Jason’s only friends he’s made since moving to Seattle and he’s grateful for him.

“What do you mean Jason? You were married; you had to have dated in order to get to that point.”

“Yeah Spezz, but the last time I dated Facebook hadn’t even been invented yet. I don’t even think Google was around!”

“Okay old-timer, relax. It’s really not that different. You know what - that’s a lie. The dates I went on in college are totally different than the ones I went on with Jen. But that’s because I’m older, not because of Facebook.”

“I guess I’m just worried. How do you _find_ people?”

“Dude, I’m sorry, but I am so married that I don’t even know where to begin with this. I think Jen said something about guys with cute butts? Yeah, I’m pretty sure that girls like guys who have cute butts.”

“Do I have a cute butt?” Jason gets up from the bar and makes a show of turning his ass towards Spezza. Spezza actually gives his butt a considering look.

“I mean, you’re no Sidney Crosby, but your ass is pretty great. At least I think so.”

“Dude, how does he walk around with that thing? And play hockey? I don’t understand. Can you sit on an ass that big?”

Jason is giving him an amused and slightly confused look. “How much attention do you pay to Crosby’s ass? You know you’re supposed to watch the puck, right? That’s the thing they hit with the sticks into the nets and everyone cheers?”

Jason’s face turns red. “Yeah,uh that reminds me. There was something I wanted to tell you actually. Now seems like a good time to bring it up.”

Spezza seems to understand that Jason is about to tell him something important because he stops laughing at him and his face turns serious. “What’s up, Jason? Is something wrong?”

“Not really? I just…there’s something I’ve figured out recently? I haven’t told anyone and I need to tell _someone.”_ Spezza nods and gestures for Jason to continue talking. “I guess – well I mean I _know_ I’m attracted to guys?” Jason ends up phrasing it more like a question, mostly because of how nervous he is about Spezza’s reaction.

Spezza shrugs and says, “Nice dude. Good for you!” Suddenly, his face lights up. “Dude, that’s what you need to do. You need to date a guy. Maybe, like, right now your brain is focused more on the fact that you like dudes so you should try dating a dude.”

Jason considers this for a moment, “First of all, bro, thanks for not like, freaking out.” Jason shakes his head like that’s the craziest thing anyone could have ever done. “Second, maybe you’re right. I haven’t even _tried_ dating guys yet.”

“Dude, that one guy from the Smith job – Logan? I could totally set you up with him. I think he had a cute butt.”

“You are way more obsessed with this butt thing than I am Spezz. But…yeah. Give him my phone number. I might as well try it out, right?”

“That’s the spirit!”

A few days later, when Henry is back from his grandparent’s house, Jason sits him down to talk. Henry immediately thinks that he’s in trouble.

“What did I do, Dad?”

“Nothing. But I am thinking that we don’t talk enough, since your first reaction to me telling you we need to talk is to assume you’re in trouble.”

“You said ‘we need to talk’ Dad. That’s like code for ‘something is very wrong’.”

“Wow, okay. How old are you again?”

“I’m ten, Dad.”

“Yes, Henry I know I was trying to – Nevermind. I have something I need to tell you.” Henry looks curious, but doesn’t say anything in response. Jason takes this as an invitation to continue speaking, “You know how I've has been going on dates with girls?” Henry nods. “Well, how would you feel if I went on a date with a boy?”

Henry looks like he’s considering this for a moment, and then he asks, “Is he nice?”

Jason laughs, “Yes, honey. He’s very nice.”

“Good. Don’t date anyone mean Dad.”

“Does this mean you’re okay with it?”

“Yep.” Henry nods vigorously.

“Even though it’s a guy?”

“Dad, it’s 2015, everyone is a little gay.”

Jason laughs again, mostly from shock. “Where in the world did you hear that?”

“Justin’s house. His sister is gay.”

Jason just shakes his head like he can’t believe this is his kid. “Well okay then. I’ll set up that date then.”

////

It’s movie night, and for once, Jordie doesn’t object to Tyler’s choice. Tyler had taken ten minutes to pick between _Casablanca_ and _An Affair to remember_ before finally deciding on the latter. Jordie had been silently hoping that Tyler wouldn’t pick _Casablanca_ because it was Brenden’s favorite movie. Jordie is trying not to think about Brenden right now.

Tyler puts the movie in the DVD player and returns to the couch to curl up with Jamie. Jordie stares at them for a moment, appreciating the fact that his little brother looks so happy nestled on the couch with his boyfriend. When Jamie looked over at him and caught him staring, Jordie looked back down at the computer screen.

Halfway through the movie, Jordie had mostly abandoned the computer on his lap and was watching the movie intently. He let out a huff of breath at one point and Tyler looked over at him. “What’s wrong Jordie? Hate the movie just like you hate all of my choices?”

Jamie laughs at that before saying, “Yeah right Tyler. He’s been glued to the screen for the past hour.”

Jordie blushes, “It’s really good okay? Honestly, these people know how to be in love. People used to know how to be in love! What happened?”

Tyler scoffs at him and says, “I just figured out your problem, Jordie. You don’t want to be in love. You want to be in love _in a movie_!”

Jamie nods in agreement. “Yeah, Jordie. No real relationship is like this.” He moves like he’s going to look at Jordie’s computer screen and Jordie jerks it away from him. Jamie looks suspicious, “What are you doing, Jordie?”

Before Jordie knows what is going on, Tyler has leapt off the couch and snatched his laptop. Jordie lunges for it, but Tyler is too fast. Tyler looks down at the screen and then back at Jordie. “Dear Sleepless in Seattle? Jordie, what is this? Are you writing a letter to radio guy?”

Jordie is really embarrassed, so he just nods. Jamie looks surprised, “Really, Jordie?” Tyler hands the computer back to Jordie, but not before he says, “You have to let me read that, bro.”

Jordie shakes his head, “No way man. You’ll chirp me about this for ages. I’m not giving you anymore dirt on me than you already have.”

“Come on bro! Let me live vicariously through you! Jamie back me up on this.”

Jamie just shakes his head, “What about Brenden, Jordie? Have you figured that out yet?”

“Not yet. I really wish I could forget about this stupid Seattle guy and just marry Brenden. Brenden is perfect and I’m just ignoring him.”

Tyler makes gagging noises and Jordie kicks him in the shin. “I know I have Brenden, you guys. But what if this Seattle guy is my _destiny”_

Jamie laughs, “Tyler is _my_ destiny and look at what I’m stuck with!” Tyler looks hurt, but Jamie quickly kisses him and it seems like Tyler forgives him.

Jordie shakes his head, “Jamie, I don’t know how you do it, but you somehow always manage to insult and flirt with Tyler at the same time.”

“It’s called game, Jordie. You should try it sometime.”

Jordie rolls his eyes and returns to the letter. He begins reading out loud, “Meet me in New York on Valentine’s Day at the top of the Empire State Building.”

Tyler jerks his head over to Jordie, “Dude! That’s from the movie! That’s cute as hell.”

“Yeah, I know. And I’ll be there with Brenden, so it’ll work out.” He pauses for a second while he realizes what he just said. “I’ll be in New York with _Brenden. My fiancé._ What am I doing?” He shuts the computer and sets it on the floor, clearly frustrated with himself.

Jamie looks like he’s going to say something, but Tyler shushes him, “Shh babe this is the best part.” Tyler’s right. It’s Jordie’s favorite part of the movie and he finds himself mouthing the words along with the characters.

_-“It’s now or never.”_

_“Never is a frightening word.”_

_-“We’d be fools to let happiness pass us by.”_

_“Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories.”_

_-“We’ve already missed the spring.”_

_“Yes.”_

Jordie looks over at Tyler and he’s crying. Jamie is looking back and forth between his sobbing boyfriend and his brother, who now has a tear rolling down his cheek. “You guys are crazy.” Jordie throws a pillow at him.

The next day, before their game against Anaheim, Jamie corners Jordie in the locker room. “I have something for you.” Jordie raises his eyebrows. He reaches out his hand to take whatever Jamie has, but Jamie shakes his head. “It’s not a physical thing.”

Jordie is confused, but gestures for Jamie to continue talking. Jamie smirks before he says, “I found your guy. The radio guy.” Jordie knits his eyebrows together, still confused. “Sleepless in Seattle, Jordie. Your loverboy.”

Jordie blushes, “What do you mean you found him?”

“Well, I was in PT yesterday and I was telling Katie about the radio thing – don’t worry I didn’t mention your obsession. Anyway apparently her brother knows the guy? He lives in Chicago and he used to work with him. So, do you wanna know his name?”

Jordie shakes his head vigorously, “No man. No fuckin' way. The last thing I need is for this shit to get worse.”

Jamie nods and looks like he’s going to walk away. Jordie goes back to tying his skates as Jamie leans in and says, “His name is Jason Demers,” he smirks again as he runs away. Jordie throws his pads at Jamie, who easily dodges them.

Jordie spends the whole game distracted. He misses an easy block of a shot by Getzlaf, but luckily Kari stops it. Jamie gives him a look that snaps him out of it. They end up winning the game, but Jamie still ribs Jordie for being out of it for the entire first period. Jordie tries to point out that it’s Jamie’s fault, but he’s having none of it. Jamie invites him to hang out with them, but Jordie heard Tyler say the words ‘hat trick blow job’ and Jordie is getting as far away from that as possible.

Jordie goes back to the hotel room he shares with Klingberg. He’s on his bed, skyping with his girlfriend in Swedish. Jordie tries to lay on his bed and read, but he can’t concentrate with Klinger’s yammering in the background. Jordie takes his iPad and goes into the bathroom to get away for a while. He runs back out to grab a few pillows off the bed and Klinger gives him a weird look. He shuts the door behind in and throws the pillows into the bathtub.

Once he gets the pillows adjusted, Jordie settles in and unlocks his iPad. He ignores the picture of him and Brenden he has set as his background and opens up Facebook. He hesitates for a moment before typing ‘Jason Demers’ into the search bar. It takes him a minute of scrolling through the different profiles to find one that has Seattle as the current location. He clicks on it and is immediately faced with a picture of a smiling man wearing a Seahawks hat. At least he has good taste in football teams.

He feels weird about it, but Jordie scrolls through some of the guy’s pictures. He has to stop when he gets to a picture of the guy with a woman and a small kid. Jordie guesses this is his dead wife and his son. It makes him sad all of the sudden and he flicks out of the pictures. He looks through some of the guy’s posts, but it’s clear he doesn’t update it much. His relationship status still says ‘married’ and most of the posts on his wall are months old. Still, Jordie spends two hours looking through his page. Then, he googles the guy’s name and finds his architecture business’s page. Jordie doesn’t know that much about architecture, so he doesn’t spend that much time on there.

He glances at the little clock at the top of the screen and realizes it’s three in the morning. He climbs out of the tub and stretches his incredibly stiff muscles. He grabs the pillows from the tub and heads back out to his bed, Klinger is passed out with his phone on his face. Jordie chuckles as he lies down and settles in. As he falls asleep, Jordie finds himself wondering what Jason in Seattle is doing right now.

///

“Henry! Get the door please? HENRY!”

“What dad? I’m busy.”

“I can’t imagine what you could be busy doing, but can you please get the door? Lisa is here to babysit you.”

“I’m not a baby dad.”

“Okay she’s here to pre-teen sit you. Whatever. Just get the door please?”

Henry huffs, but goes down the stairs to get the door. Jason hears him talking to the sitter, probably already trying to convince her to let him stay up late. Jason looks at himself in the mirror, trying to get his hair just right. He goes downstairs and finds Henry and Lisa in the living room.

“Does my hair look stupid?” Neither Lisa nor Henry even looks at him. Lisa is already glued to the TV and Henry is going through the mail.

“Dad, this letter is addressed to both of us! Can I open it?”

“Sure bud, that’s fine. Can you please unglue your eyes from the TV for one second Lisa? I’m trying to make sure I don’t look like a total idiot on my date.” She looks over at him, gives him a thumbs up, and looks right back at the TV. Jason sighs and goes to look in the mirror one last time.

When he comes back to the living room, Henry is reading the letter they got in the mail.

“Dad! This one’s perfect! Look!”

Jason rolls his eyes but starts reading the letter, “Hi. My name is Jordie from Dallas. I’ve never written a letter like this in my life, but I heard your radio show and I had to. Before we go any further, it’s important you know that I love hockey. Frankly, if you don’t love hockey, this isn’t going to work.”

“See Dad? He loves hockey!”

“So?”

“So you love hockey too! His name is Jordie and he lives in Dallas and I think he’s perfect!”

“Honey, I’m from Canada. If I didn’t like hockey, they wouldn't let me back in.”

“Daaad. I like this one! Jordie is the one I like! It’s a sign!”

“A sign? You wanna see a sign?” Jason pulls up a U.S. map on their computer. He turns to Henry. “Point to Seattle.” Henry does. “Okay now point to Dallas.” Henry hesitates before pointing at Oklahoma. Jason moves his finger to Texas and says, “See? There’s like ten states in between us. That’s a sign for you!”

“Dad, please don’t go on this date! We have to write back to Jordie!”

“I’m leaving. Lisa, make sure he’s in bed by nine.”

Jason leaves before Henry can say anything else about the guy from Dallas. Jason admits that the guy had sounded pretty nice, but he can’t be worrying about some random guy that heard him on the radio. Jason gets to the restaurant and sees Logan sitting at a table. He walks over and sits down. The waiter has just taken their drink order when another employee walks over, “I’m sorry, but are you Jason?” Jason nods. “Your son is on the phone, he says it’s an emergency.” Jason looks at Logan apologetically before getting up to go to the phone.

“Henry? What’s wrong?”

“Dad, we have to go to New York for Valentine’s Day.”

“What?”

“We have to go to New York for Valentine’s Day to meet Jordie from Dallas.”

“Henry?”

“Yeah Dad?”

“Are you hurt? Is the house on fire?”

“No.”

“Then don’t call me.”

“But Dad…”

“Not now Henry. I’m hanging up now. I can’t believe I’ve let the conversation last this long. Goodbye.”

Jason gets back to the table and shakes his head. Logan is looking at him expectantly.

“Do you have kids, Logan?”

“Uh, no.”

“Well, do you want mine?”

Logan laughs at this and takes Jason’s hand. They move on to talking about other things and before Jason knows it, they’ve been there for two hours. Logan walks Jason to his car and grabs his waist before he gets in the car.

“I had a really nice time tonight, Jason.”

Jason manages to squeak out a response, “Yeah me too. We should get together again. Soon.”

Logan nods before leaning in to kiss Jason. He tastes like wine and steak and it makes Jason feel lightheaded. When he pulls away, Logan is smiling.

“Real soon.”

Logan walks away as Jason gets into his car. He could get used to this.

Jason and Logan go on a few more dates before he introduces him to Henry. He wants to be sure that Logan is a sure thing before he gets Henry involved. After their fourth date, Jason is pretty in love with Logan. Logan takes him to the aquarium and holds his hand the entire time. They both coo at the baby seals and Jason squeezes Logan’s hand when they reach the shark exhibit. As they’re driving back to Jason’s house, Jason turns to look at Logan.

“How do you feel about coming over tonight for dinner? I really want you to meet Henry.”

Logan’s face lights up, “I would love that. I could make my world famous spaghetti for you guys.”

“World famous huh?”

“Oh yeah. You should see me open the jar of sauce. You think you’ve seen it all, but you ain’t seen nothing yet.”

Jason laughs at him and calls Henry to tell him to expect company for dinner. He throws a fit and Jason can hear the babysitter in the background trying to calm him down.

When Logan gets to their house later that night, Henry has calmed down. He’s polite to Logan, but that’s it. He watches Logan move around the kitchen, but he doesn’t say anything. Logan tries to get him to help, but Henry just shakes his head. Jason gives him a look, but Henry just sticks his tongue out.

As Logan is finishing the pasta, Henry wanders over the stove.

“Hey buddy! Finally decide you were gonna help me out?”

“No. I was wondering if you like hockey.”

“Hmm. Don’t think I’ve ever watched it. Maybe you could get me into it?”

Henry looks at his dad meaningfully, but Jason just shakes his head. “He doesn’t even like hockey Dad.”

“Henry, don’t be rude.”

“Sorry,” Henry says, unconvincingly.

Jason just gives Logan an ‘I don’t even know’ look and helps him plate the food. Dinner is a lot of the same, Henry questioning Logan nonstop and Jason trying to butt in the whole time. By the end of the meal, Henry doesn’t seem to have warmed up to Logan at all. Jason sends him to bed early, making him first thank Logan for dinner.

“Thanks for dinner Logan. I’ve never seen anyone do that with spaghetti before.”

“Henry! Cut the sass!”

Henry sticks his tongue out at Jason and runs upstairs before Jason can do anything about it. Jason just turns to Logan and shrugs. “He’s terrible right now.”

Logan just laughs, “Eh it’s no big deal. Not like I expected him to like me right away. He seems like a great kid. And I hear his dad is pretty fantastic.”

“Oh yeah? I heard he was a bit of a tool. Great ass though.”

Logan walks over to Jason and wraps his arms around him, reaching down to squeeze his ass before running his hands up and down his back. Jason sighs and leans into his touch. “I’m really glad you came over tonight. I needed this.”

Logan smiles and kisses Jason.

///

Jordie is woken up by the sound of Harry Styles singing about what makes him beautiful. He reaches over to the nightstand and grabs his phone. “This better be important Tyler.”

“Turn on your radio. Now.”

“What?” Jordie is still half asleep and not totally sure about what is going on. Brenden stirs beside him, grumbling.

“Your radio! It’s that Seattle kid again! You’ve got me listening to this crap!”

Jordie crawls out of bed and heads down to the kitchen, grabbing the radio and ducking into the hall closet. He feels a little dumb hiding from Brenden, but it would be hard to explain why he’s listening to the radio at one in the morning. When he turns the radio on, the kid is freaking out.

                “ _Help me! You gotta help me! My dad is dating a ho!”_

_Now, Henry. You shouldn’t call people names. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on._

_“My dad is dating this guy – “_

_Does that bother you? That it’s a guy?_

_“What? No! I don’t care if it’s a guy!”_

_Then what’s the problem?_

_“He just brought all this food here and he’s cooking dinner like he lives here!”_

_And what’s wrong with that?_

_“He’s the worst! He doesn’t like hockey and he always snorts when he laughs. OH MY GOD. They’re kissing now! He’s touching my dad’s butt. He’s a ho!”_

_Henry, it seems like you’re just afraid of losing your dad. Henry?_

It seems like the kid has hung up at that point. Jordie sits in the closet for a minute before he realizes his heart is racing. He’s disappointed that this guy is dating someone.

A few days later, they have a game in Vancouver. Jordie can’t stop thinking about how close they are to Seattle. By the time the game is over, he’s made a decision. He has to clear it with Jamie first.

“Hey Jamie, you got a minute?”

“Sure Jordie, what’s up?”

“I was thinking…I don’t think I’m going to fly back with the team.”

“Why not? You know mom and dad are on vacation right? Otherwise I’d visit them.”

“Yeah, I’m not going home, Jamie. I was thinking about going to Seattle?” Jordie waits for Jamie to tell him no. To tell him that it’s a terrible idea and kind of creepy. When he actually looks at Jamie to gauge his response, he’s surprised to see him grinning.

“Pleases tell me this has to do with that radio guy.”

“It might.”

Jamie grabs him into a bear hug and whoops. “This might be the best idea you’ve ever had. You have to tell me how it goes!”

Jordie nods and reassures Jamie that he will give him a play by play. Jordie rents a car that night and starts heading towards Seattle. It only takes a few hours for him to get there, but he’s exhausted by the time he checks into his hotel.

He gets up around nine the next day and seriously considers leaving Seattle without even attempting to find his guy. Of course he doesn’t. He finally gets the courage to drive to the guy’s house around eleven. He parks across the street and gets out to explore. It doesn’t seem like anyone’s home. Feeling like a complete creep, Jordie walks all around the house and knocks on the front door. No response. He sees a dock nearby and walks over to it. He sees a guy and small kid in a little boat, driving out to open water.

Jordie hops into his car and attempts to follow them. They end up at a small beach. Jordie parks his car and goes to sit on a nearby park bench. Luckily he had a book with him, so he can pretend to read while he watches the guy and his son play. The first thing Jordie notices is that the guy is incredibly attractive. The second thing he notices is that the guy seems to be pretty happy. He and his kid spend the day making sandcastles and chasing each other around. By the time they leave, Jordie feels closer to them.

He heads back to his hotel and calls Jamie.

“I think I’m officially crazy, Jamie.”

“Why? Did you talk to him?”

“No, I couldn’t.”

“Jordie! The whole point of you going there was to meet this guy! You can’t do that if you don’t talk to him.”

“I know. I just got scared. What if he thinks I’m weird?”

“Well there’s no getting around that. Everyone thinks you’re weird.”

“Jamie, I’m serious.”

“I don’t know Jordie. But you have to at least try to meet him.”

Jordie promises Jamie that he will actually try to talk to the guy tomorrow. When he gets to their house the next day, he’s all ready to walk over and meet the guy when an SUV pulls up. A man gets out and runs up to both of them. He scoops the kid up and hugs Jason at the same time. Jordie is frozen on the spot. He’s shaken out of his trance by the loud honking of a horn. He had somehow walked into the street and a truck was headed right towards his. He jumps back to avoid it.

When he looks back up, Jason is watching him. He walks in his direction before stopping and saying, “Hello?”

Jordie just replies, “Hello.”

Before he can say anything else, another horns honks and he has to scramble out of the way to avoid it. He gets into his car without looking back and leaves.

He goes to Jamie’s house when he finally gets back home. Tyler and Jamie immediately start asking him all kinds of questions about what happened in Seattle.

He tells them what happened, catching Tyler up before explaining what happened on the second day. “It was awful. All I could say was hello.”

Tyler jumps up and screams, “What did you just say. Oh my god. You did not.” He hurries over to his computer and pulls up a movie. Jamie looks at Jordie like he has no idea what’s happening. Tyler shoves his computer into Jordie’s face and presses play on the movie. It’s _An Affair to Remember_ again. The woman on the screen says “All I could say was hello.”

“See Jordie? This is so obvious, oh my god. You and Seattle guy are meant for each other! This is a sign!”

“Yeah, Tyler it’s a sign that you’ve made me watch that movie too many times. God, how could I be such an idiot! Of course this guy has someone! And I have Brenden! How could I do this to him?”

Jamie and Tyler are both staring at him. Jamie breaks the silence by handing him a letter and saying, “This came here for you. Not really sure why though.”

Jordie opens it and begins to read it aloud. “Dear Jordie, thank you for your letter. You sound neat.” He looks up at Tyler. “Did you mail my letter?”

“I might have. Can’t really remember.”

“Tyler, what the fuck dude?”

“What! You were never gonna do it! Anyway what else does it say? Is he gonna meet you?”

“Apparently, but that doesn’t matter. I have to stop with this. I can’t do this to Brenden.”

////

“It was really weird Kevin. I felt like I knew that guy.”

“Well, have you ever seen him before?”

“I don’t think so, but I felt like I knew him!”

Kevin, Jason, and Kevin’s wife, Kim are all sitting around the living room, drinking wine and catching up. Jason is grateful for adult company. They were discussing the man Jason had seen on the highway earlier that day.

Henry walks in the room and says, “Did you know my dad is dating?”

Kevin looks at him and says, “Yeah, he hasn’t introduced me yet, though.”

“That’s okay. Logan’s not that great.”

“Henry!”

“What, Dad? He tells really dumb jokes and wears too much cologne!”

“Is that true Jason? Does he wear too much cologne?” Kevin is smirking.

Jason wiggles his hand back and forth and says, “Eh maybe a little. But it’s not like I’m trying to marry this guy. I’m just dating. Having fun? Aren’t I allowed to do that?”

Kevin nods in agreement.

“Henry, why don’t you tell them what you did? He called into one of those talk radio shows on Christmas and told them I needed a date. I had to talk to this radio lady for like an hour while she grilled me.”

“That’s sweet though. He obviously cares.” Kim is looking fondly at Henry.

“Yeah well you should see all the letters I got. Henry’s obsessed with this one guy who wants to meet at the top of the Empire State Building on Valentine’s Day.”

“Oh my god! It’s like that movie!”

Jason and Kim turn to look at Kevin. “What movie?”

“ _An Affair to Remember._ Cary Grant and Deborah Karr? Kerr? Whatever, anyway they plan to meet at the top of the Empire State Building too! God, that’s romantic.”

Jason gives Kevin a weird look, “You are so strange. Anyway, I’m not going to do it, the guy could be a serial killer.”

////

“So Jordie, what are you are for tomorrow?”

“Brenden and I are going to dinner. I’m pretty sure I’ve told you this already.”

“Okay, but what about Seattle guy? Empire State Building?” Tyler is looking at him expectantly.

“Yeah, Tyler that ship has sailed. I’m done chasing after random radio guys. I’m engaged remember?”

“I still think you’re making a huge mistake.”

Jamie intervenes, “Tyler, Jordie’s a big boy. He can make this decision for himself. Even if he is making the wrong decision.”

“You guys are terrible.”

Jordie meets Brenden at the restaurant the next day. They go to their table, and Jordie notices that he has a perfect view of the Empire State Building. He looks away.

“What a view!” Brenden is staring out the window.

“I’m just happy to see you. It feels like it’s been forever.”

“I know. You seemed like you were getting away from me for a while there. But I feel like you’re coming back now.”

“I think I was just nervous, you know? About getting married. Weren’t you ever nervous?”

Brenden gives him a confused look, “Not really. You’re a sure thing.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a box. “Here I got you this.”

Jordie opens the box and finds a beautiful gold chain inside. “I love it. Thanks Brenden” He reaches over and grabs his hand, and for once Brenden holds onto it.

////

“Henry! Hurry up and get down here!” Jason is running about fifteen minutes late. He and Logan are supposed to be going away for the weekend, and Henry can’t seem to come down so he can leave. Jason turns to look at the sitter, “Can you go check on him for me? I’m gonna run my stuff out to my car. I’ll come back and say goodbye.”

The sitter nods and heads up the stairs. Jason manages to get all of his bags into the car in record time. He heads back into the house and he’s met by the sitter walking down the stairs. She looks stressed.

“I can’t find him Jason. He’s not up there.”

Jason and the sitter frantically search the house twice. Jason even does a few laps around the outside of the house, just to be sure. Finally, they decide he isn’t there anymore. Jason is in full panic mode. His first thought is to call one of Henry’s friend’s parents. Henry spends a lot of time at Elizabeth’s house when Jason has to stay late at work.

Her parents pick up on the first ring. They immediately tell him that Henry isn’t there. He asks them to check with Elizabeth to see if she has any idea where he could have gone. After about ten minutes of prodding, Elizabeth tells her parents that Henry is in New York.

“New York? How did he get to New York?!”

“It seems that Elizabeth snuck into my husband’s office and booked him a plane ticket.”

“What? How – When does his flight leave?”

“It’s boarding now.”

“God dammit. My kid is alone in the airport on his way to a city he’s never even set foot in. I gotta go after him.”

Jason gets in his car and pushes the speed limit all the way to the airport. He sprints to the ticket counter and waits impatiently until his flight boards. He spends the whole flight thinking of every bad thing that could be happening to Henry. He realizes about halfway through the flight that it’s Valentine’s weekend. Henry is probably on his way to the Empire State Building to meet the guy who wrote them the letter. Jason is suddenly even more anxious than before.

////

Jordie looks up and Brenden and makes a decision. “Hey, there’s something I have to tell you about.”

Brenden looks concerned, but gestures for Jordie to continue. Jordie begins to explain the whole story, starting with Christmas. He tells him about hearing the guy on the radio and Tyler mailing the letter. He skips the part about traveling to Seattle because he stills feels weird about that.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m sorry. I’ve spent the past two months thinking about some other guy when I’ve been engaged to you.”

“Are you telling me this guy could be waiting at the top of the Empire State Building right now?”

“No. There’s no way. I mean, he could be, but probably not.”

“Jordie, I don’t want you to marry me because you think it’s the right thing to do or it’s what you’re supposed to do. I don’t want to be the guy you settle for. That’s no way to start a marriage.”

“I don’t deserve you anyway. You’re too good for me.”

“Nonsense. Now get the hell out of here.”

Jordie gets up to leave and stops. He turns back around and reaches into his pocket. He grabs the chain Brenden had given him and pulls the ring off his finger. He hands both of them to Brenden before turning and sprinting out the door. He manages to catch a cab.

“Empire State Building!”

////

When Jason finally reaches the Empire State Building, he practically knocks an entire family over trying to get to the elevator. The elevator moves way too slowly for Jason, but there’s nothing he can do about it. It finally reaches the top and Jason rushes out.

He runs around, looking for Henry. He finally spots him next to one of the mounted binoculars near the edge. He hurries over, shouting Henry’s name.

“Henry! Henry!”

Henry turns around and smiles, “Dad!”

“Henry! I’m so glad I found you, honey. Don’t ever do that again. You are my whole world. You’re all I’ve got, buddy.” Jason grabs Henry into a hug and holds on like he’s never going to let go.

“Come on buddy, let’s get out of here.”

////

Of course Jordie would get stuck in traffic on what is arguably the most important day of his life. He finally decides he’s had enough and jumps out of the cab. He quickly pays the driver and starts sprinting towards Fifth Avenue. He checks his watch and he’s pretty sure he’s not going to make it in time. He tries to pick up the pace, running as fast as he’s able.

He finally reaches the building with five minutes to spare. He walks up to the elevator operator, gasping for breath. “Can I go up please?”

“Sorry son. Last elevator went up already.”

“I missed it? Oh god I missed it.”

Jordie doesn’t know what to do. He turns back to the elevator operator.

“Look, this is going to sound absolutely crazy, but I have to get up there. I’m supposed to be meeting someone up there and I’m not even sure if he’s up there, but if I don’t try, then I’ll always regret it.”

The operator smiles at him, “ _An Affair to Remember_ right? That’s my wife’s favorite movie. You can go up, kid.”

He opens the elevator and Jordie gets in, thanking him. When he reaches the top, it’s empty. Jordie is heartbroken. He turns to the operator, “Can I have a minute?”

“Sure, kid.”

Jordie walks over to the edge, standing next to one of the binoculars. He looks down and sees a small backpack. He reaches down to pick it up. It’s open and there’s a small bear on top.

Jordie hears voices behind him.

“I think I left it right over there, Dad.”

“Okay Henry, hurry up.”

Jordie turns around. He locks eyes with Jason from Seattle. All of the air goes out of his lungs. They both stand there for a moment, staring at each other.

“It’s you,” Jason says.

“It’s me.”

“I saw you outside my house.”

Henry walks up to Jordie. “Are you Jordie?” he asks.

“Yes.” He smiles down at Henry.

“You’re Jordie?” Jason’s mouth is hanging open.

Jordie nods.

“I’m Henry. This is my dad, Jason”

Jordie looks at Jason and says, “Jason,” before smiling.

The operator clears his throat.

“We better go,” Jason says.

Jordie looks down.

Jason holds out his hand towards Jordie, “Shall we?”

Jordie looks up and meets his eyes, smiling before he takes his hand. They keep looking at each other the whole time they’re walking back to the elevator. Jordie turns to Jason and says, “Jason, it’s nice to meet you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is only my second fic, so any critcisms and editing notes are welcome!
> 
> I'm on tumblr over at [dartheighter](http://dartheighter.tumblr.com/)
> 
> My [beautiful best friend](http://archiveofourown.org/users/jacksmannequinn) beta-ed this for me. You can find her on tumblr at ughhgghg.tumblr.com I have to thank her for listening to all of my ramblings and ideas about this fic, especially since she's never seen the movie.


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